Eurovision 2015: The OTI Eurovision Awards

Celebrating the things that make Eurovision the best singing competition no American has ever heard of.

It’s once again time for us to roll up our sleeves, take a deep breath, and try to remember where Estonia is. Actually, I’ll just speak for myself here: I can’t keep my European geography straight, even after years of following Eurovision obsessively. England? Kid’s stuff. Portugal? Little thing tacked onto Spain. But once I go further east than Germany it’s all just colorful blotches. If anyone knows of some web-based geography trainer video game, I need it, because for the next two months places like Belarus and Moldova are going to be near and dear to my heart.

But before we get into the reviews we wanted to announce some awards we will be giving out after the competition. We felt like just debating which country was going to “win” Eurovision was too limiting, because there are a LOT of ways to win Eurovision in our book. We limited ourselves to six award categories, but we could have come up with plenty more:

  • More Annoying Anti-War Song
  • Greatest Violin Solo
  • The Celine Dion Award for Best Ballad
  • Best James Bond Theme Song

What awards would YOU give out? Let us know in the comments. And stay tuned for our first review, coming this week!

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15 Comments on “Eurovision 2015: The OTI Eurovision Awards”

  1. Richard #

    Most Annoying Use of Special Effects
    Best Use of Folk/Traditional Instrumentation or Style


  2. Simber #

    * Weirdest combination of music and acrobatics/gymnastics/sports display
    * Scariest supposedly hot-in-their-home-country performer
    * Hottest girl with facial hair
    * Most pathetic effort by one of the Big Five countries (UK wins this every year)
    * Best onstage costume change
    * Stormiest wind machine
    And don’t judge just the songs!
    * Weirdest country introduction movie clip
    * Most geographically inexplicable points given from one country to another (12 points from Macedonia to Belgium?! Is it the chocolate trade?)
    * Longestwinded introduction of the local celeb who announces the points


  3. Kevin Deegan-Krause #

    Another category worth an award:
    Song title most likely to be appropriated by a politician!
    “A Million Voices” would seem the easy choice, but “Playing With Numbers” is perhaps more appropriate.

    The 6 people in the world who are interested in the intersection between Eurovision and politics may find this game amusing:


    • Calvin #

      And then you have “Verjamem,” which is both a centrist Slovenian party and their 2012 Eurovision entrant!


  4. Kate #

    If we’re talking most annoying anti-war song, even the irony of Russia’s entry can’t compare with the sleeping pill Hungary is sending. Come on, you just came in fourth last year. What happened?

    This year ‘Most Bizarre Scandal’ might be a worthwhile category.


  5. Chimalpahin #

    Lovely podcast as always. You really never saw Lilo & Stitch, Fenzel? It’s cool, I’ve never seen Breaking Bad.

    I loved that movie as a kid. It reminds me of My Neighbor Totoro, if they forced an external conflict onto the story. Just having a person of color up there was great, they could’ve just had a haoli girl but they chose better :) She’s such a great character, there was even an ongoing tv show and later an anime where they sadly ditched Lilo for a Japanese girl, Yuna.


  6. Kevin Deegan-Krause #

    My kids (9 and 11–I’ve led them early into bad habits) have suggested two additional categories:

    1) Worst metaphor (We haven’t heard all the songs yet, but the leader so far, by a large margin is Russia’s “Your heart is like a beating drum burning brighter than the sun.” My kids didn’t suggest it but the song also begs for a “least helpful explanation” award for the line “We are the worlds people, different yet we’re the same”

    2) Most pyrotechnics. My daughter, when she was 5, summed up the contest as a whole in a three word explanation to a friend: “Sometimes there’s fire.”


    • Matthew Belinkie OTI Staff #

      Kevin, when my oldest was five I showed him Eurovision for the first time, the year Ell and Nicki did their duet for Azerbaijan. He couldn’t get over the curtain of sparks that fell down behind them. “Look at all the fire! How are they not afraid with all that fire around them? Those guys will definitely win.” They did.


  7. Mark #

    Hooray, Eurovision! Thanks to Conchita Wurst’s magnificence the Contest is here in Vienna this year, and we actually got tickets, on the floor for the 2nd semifinal broadcast. Maybe I’ll write up and submit an article on the Eurovision experience in person. Should we do Eurovision Cosplay when we attend? I’m thinking something Lordi-themed, or maybe Jedward. I will try to convince my wife to wear something from the Polish entry of last year… ;)


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