[You may find it helpful to read this post first.]
- One-third of an oreo and two ounces of cold milk.
- Clean, dry socks.
- Guessing Wheel Of Fortune phrase before any of the contestants.
- Happy Birthday wishes (via Facebook) from high school aquaintance.
- On crowded subway, next to man listening to his iPod, you can kind of hear the guitar solo from “Sweet Child of Mine.”
- Finding three dollars wadded up in the pocket of your jeans.
- An isolated room where you can fart vigorously without fear of censure or reprisal.
- Being told “I’m just not ready to be in a relationship with anyone right now.”
- Tivo records House rerun that you have not already seen.
- That cute barrista is working today, the one with the tattoo. Jenny–her name tag says Jenny. She smiles as she hands you your order, and says “Thanks, have a nice day!”
- “Thank you, Jenny,” you whisper–to yourself–as you walk out of the Starbucks and back into the sad, cruel everyday of our solitary lives.