THIS IS THE ORIGINAL INTRODUCTION TO THIS POST, WHICH WENT ON A STRANGE JOURNEY . . . A JOURNEY INTO THE WEST . . . A QUEST FOR A WISH . . . and how that wish went unfulfilled. Why did this introduction not result in a successful post on first attempt? Read on . . .

Dozens of you have asked me whether I’ve seen this movie and what I have to say about it. Well, I just watched it on DVD, and it made me a little sick to my stomach. So, read this article. You owe me.

To say my expectations were low going into Dragonball: Abomination (sorry, Dragonball: Evolution) would be an understatement. Even using that cliché to describe it understates the degree of understatement. This is a movie that deeply disappointed me even before it was even released – originally, it was to be a big-budget, live-action Dragonball movie starring Chow Yun Fat and produced by Stephen Chow that was released on my birthday.

It became clear early on that all was not right with this production. The leaked production stills were way off the mark in any sort of reasonable stylistic approach to the material, people were complaining that Goku was a white high school student, as opposed to the child Monkey King of ancient China. It began to come out that it was being directed by the Final Destination Guy, that the studio executives were doing their usual thing and forcing awful failures of artistic decisions on the production out of their own vanity and pigheadedness, and that producer and legend in his own time Stephen Chow had been effectively cut out of the loop. The release was delayed almost a year, presumably for Pluto-Nash-related reasons.

When it came out, the marketing was disastrous. It lost its “built-in audience” almost immediately, and it never found another one. There’s almost universal belief that this movie is awful, but even hardcore Dragonball fans have pretty much refused to see it.

Until now.

What I expected was an irredeemable accident starring the guy from War of the Worlds made by a bunch of people who stole the costumes and props from the people making the Dragonball movie and decided to shoot a random-ass CGI movie about bullshit.

What I got, well, it was certainly a failure. A huge failure. It deserved to bomb with every megaton in its payload. But it wasn’t an accident. It was something quite a bit worse. It screwed everything up on purpose.

Now, the fanboy in me could bitch and moan about it all day — there’s plenty for any fanboy to bitch and moan about. But let’s put that aside for a moment, and ask the real questions — find the real reason why this movie is the way it is, and why it failed in what it attempted to do.

This will be readable for non-Dragon Ball fans and probably include some good lessons. Because with a failure this big, there are plenty of lessons.

Power up, it’s time to Read More . . .

I think one of the things that makes Miyagi so cool is that he’s largely an enigma. Does anyone know how he made the money to afford all those antique cars? And if he’s so rich, why’s he working as a handyman? Then, there’s the allusion to his military service. Personally, the idea of Mr. Miyagi at war always fascinated me.  He’s an unstoppable badass as an old man; how much ass could he have kicked in his prime, if he had something to fight for?

About three years ago, I decided to write a WWII action movie. One of the characters is a young private named Kesuke Miyagi. He’s fighting in Italy when he hears that his wife has died in childbirth. Furious at America for keeping her in an internment camp, he deserts his unit to go drown his sorrows. When the Military Police try to take him in, he lashes out and almost kills one of them. He’s court-martialed and sentenced to death. But a Major who’s familiar with Miyagi’s karate skills offers him a deal: go on a dangerous mission behind enemy lines, and maybe you’ll get a pardon. (Yes, I’ve seen The Dirty Dozen, what of it?)

In the scene below, the Major and Miyagi take advantage of an air raid in Munich to barricade themselves in a bomb shelter with a group of military wives, who they hope can lead them to their target. And now, without further ado, here’s an excerpt from The Man Who Killed Hitler.

I’m the only Asian American writer at OTI, and I’m one of those Asian Americans referred to in the previous post Reclaiming Miyagi that has beef with this character. Specifically, mine is with that (in)famous phrase, “Wax On, Wax Off”:

In a fit of Angry Asian Male Rage, I did a little video editing and voice-over to see what would happen if Mr. Miyagi lost the Asian Accent. See the remix, and what inspired it, after the jump.

Matthew Wrather hosts a panel with Peter Fenzel, Mark Lee, and Ryan Sheely, considering:

• What We Talk About When We Talk About Overthinking It (the state of the blog)
• The Craptacular state of Popular Music
• All About Academia (a brief digression)
• Karate Kid Week, which starts today!

As always, email us at podcast AT overthinkingit DOT com with your comments, or call 20-EAT-LOG-01 (that’s (203) 285-6401) to leave a voicemail.

Download Episode 23 (MP3)